Thinking about the past, wondering about the future...

Old friends have been on my mind lately. Maybe it's because I'm in a new city and am having withdrawls of friends that used to be near and dear to me. I'm not sure...
Some have moved away, some haven't, some I've lost contact with and certain relationships I just no longer have with people.
Friends are hard to come by, best friends are even harder to come by. Recently I've lost a best friend and unfortunately I just don't think it's a void that can be filled by anything or anyone else. Especially when it's your best friend that hurt you so much in the first place. I can't help but let it affect me. I've become very jaded by this.
As big as this city is, I still feel alone most times. I miss my family. I can't just drive ten minutes to be in my mom's arms, or eating her delicious home cooked meals anymore. These are the things I took for granted before, and miss now.
I am out of my comfort zone for once in my life, and it's definitely harder to adjust than I thought. I guess I have mixed feelings about it all. One day I will see my glass as half full, the next... It will be half empty.
But now, the time I do spend with my old friends and family will be more cherished. It's something to look forward to and not to be taken advantage of. Although I still feel as if a piece of me is missing here...
I was lucky. I moved here with two people who are amazing friends, (well two and a half) friends that I can lean on, and depend on. I also have some family over here to keep me grounded. I have re-connected with some old friends here that I probably wouldn't have gotten the chance to if I still lived in the Valley.
It's nice to visit, but yet doesn't feel like home anymore. I'm in the, "in-between", i figure and I haven't quite decided which side I weigh more on. The impatient me just wants to fast forward a year and know where I'm at and what I will be doing. The other part of me, let's call it the, "glass half full", part, just wants to sit back and enjoy this journey and take everything day by day. It's life. It's scary, exciting, joyful and crazy!
BUT
I'll figure it out, I always do...
After all, I AM allot smarter than I look.
Dr. Seuss once said, " On you will go, through the weather be foul. On you will go, through your enemies prowl. Onward up many a frightening creek. Though your arms may get sore, and your sneakers may leak. So be sure when you step, step with care and great tact, and remember... life's a great balancing act. And you WILL succeed, yes you will indeed!! 98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed!"